don't toy with me! {tag Selene}

[Sierra Corvin]

Warm fangs dug into my wrist, near the palm of my hand, while the pain was dull, my lips curved upwards into a smile, biting down harder, almost crushing the bones beneath my flesh. It was no big thing, just everytime I was frustrated to the point of no return, I'd bite my own wrist, enough to keep me from snapping and murdering everyone in my path. That act would send my family after me, since they killed rogue werewolves and vampires, and they wouldn't know it was me until they found me, which I refused to let that happen. I'd been away from them since I was younger, and it had been over ten years since we last saw each other. There were, reasons behind that, certain reasons I didn't want my mind to dwell on, even though it made things worse in a way I could never comprehend. But, fine, if you want to know, well, sit back for the ride baby, cos its gonna be rough! I'm kidding, maybe, who knows?

I had fallen in love. With a vampire. Then, when he went missing my heart went to a werewolf, which was forbidden(I'm a werewolf and vampire hybrid but my family still hated other werewolves). James was on our side, taking apart the rogue werewolf factions that preyed on the innocent. He too, went missing, rumor had it that him and my ex Axel fought when they found my scent on each other and both were killed. Of course, I was blamed for the tension between the two and how one vampire(who was rising in ranks to become a Death Dealer) was killed because of who I was with. I spiraled down, depression, drugs, even killing here and there, people that wouldn't be missed soon felt the twinge of my fangs entering their necks. I left home then too, didn't want the accusatory stares directed my way, nor did I want me family to be sickened with my choice of who I had fallen in love with, which you can't choose anyway, so it was unfair that I was getting all this bad attention when my mom fell in love with a werewolf. Yet I couldn't?

Now you know some of the source of my frustrations, my dark clothes easily hid within the shadows of the abandoned factory, entering on high alert with my senses reaching out. This place was huge, gutted out by a fire that happened some years ago. The scent of charred wood tickled my nose, just imagining the blaze and roar of fire. It made me shiver as I walked further inside, checking out the main entrance part which was all black and gray with soot and left over ash from the fire. Someone had been here, their scents were all over the place. A few old vampire scents, some werewolf, some human. Reaching underneath my shirt, I pulled out the chain, the vial holding white substance. Being who I was, drugs didn't have the effect that it gave humans, it sped through my system too fast to get a real good hit. Still, as I uncorked the top and sniffed, the first wave hit my blood stream, weak but it was there. I needed a shit load for it to actually do much more like what humans experienced. Laying down on a patch of the ground, I moved so I could stare at the moonlight just above the broken patches of rooftop.

[Selene]

Selene

My daughter was in trouble. That much I knew. I had a team of Death Dealers working on trying to pick up her trail but it was difficult for them. Sierra was trained well. The only one that could really track her was me. I just needed something to go on. My daughter's trail had gone cold. I had tried to let Sierra do what she needed to do for herself, but then I knew something was wrong after awhile. In the end it was me that picked up her trail again. I can be quite persuasive when I need to be.

Being the head of the Death Dealers also had it's advantages. I had resources at my disposal. A true immortal now. A hybrid of sorts. Normally I always remained reserved, calm, cold, calculating. Except when it came to my family. Michael who was off God knows where, either fighting or trying to form a truce with some faction or other. I was used to his being gone. It didn't mean I didn't miss for him and ache for him though.

Then there were my two daughters. Gwen, the oldest was one of the best. A Death Dealer through and through. She lived for the fight because of the fight, because they were at war still. Even though I had tried to broker a peace between the races. There was so much bad blood it wasn't likely to happen anytime soon. Sierra was another matter. Though she was as talented as her sister, her skills just as good. She was the one more like Michael with her emotions. Thus she continued to be hurt and each blow sent her further into the downward spiral. Thus she had run again and I was worried.

Finally after a little of that persuasion I was so good at I had gotten a lead. Leaving the coven in capable hands I was off to find Sierra. Approaching the burnt out building I moved without a sound. Not even a disturbance of the air around me. I could could smell my daughter's scent and it was fresh and strong. Sierra was inside.

Making my way through the rubble of the building I slowed as I got to the doorway. Silently I moved into the door frame and leaned against it. My arms crossed over my chest. I watched as my daughter snorted the white powder and I sighed internally to myself. Continuing to watch for a moment as Sierra lay down on the floor. I waiting a bit before I said anything.

"Sierra? What are you doing? Why are you here? I've been worried."

I have tried to let her daughters make their own way in the world. Dealing with their unique status in their own way. Gwen forged a mighty path of her own. Embracing her destiny. Sierra was troubled, lost and I felt just as lost because I didn't know how to help her.

[Sierra Corvin]

White patches of moonlight glinted on my already pale skin, breathing deeply and calmly as I could without falling asleep. Chest rose and fell with each intake of air, pulling it deep into my lungs before exhaling in the same, fluid motion. Raising my hands, I moved them so they were behind my head, acting as sort of a pillow on the hard, sooty ground. Breathing in places like this tended to get a bit tough, the leftover ash and soot coated the inside of my nose, a sneeze ready in place to clear the passageway, while breathing through my mouth meant tasting the powdered ash, normally evolving into a coughing fit afterward. But it was the most quietest, little noise peeked through the building, owls of course hooted once or twice to communicated, but other than that, it was calming, quiet, and more importantly, I was alone. Everywhere else, I would soon have one person or another on my case and my solitude would be broken.

I didn't smell the figure that walked into the burnt out, abandoned factory, hearing a voice that made my heart leap into my throat, feeling as though I had just swallowed a golf ball wrapped in thorns. "Mom." Bolting upright, I felt the rush of blood head to my head, making me feel slightly dizzy. While I regained my senses, my eyes caught the vial, empty now, before crushing in my hand, glass shattered and stabbed my palm, oozing droplets of blood. "What question should I answer first?" I asked, keeping a tight hold onto the now, broken vial. "Isn't it obvious what I'm doing?" I threw up my arms, gesturing around the factory before opening my hand up, allowing the shards of glass to roll around my palm, splattered red from my blood. "You know what I've been doing." Not a question, but a statement. It was apparent she had seen what I had done, and quite frankly, I didn't want to bring up the fact I was snorting drugs. I wanted to avoid pity and the disappointing look in her eyes. That was something I wasn't able to handle, and really, I tried to avoid it whenever possible, even though I wasn't the perfect daughter, nor was I like Gwen, who wasn't screwed up like me.

"I'm here because its quiet, where no one could interrupt my thoughts. I was wrong." My lips curled into a half smile, allowing my breathe to trickle out and tickle my lips. "Though I do admit, if it was anyone to be here, I'm glad its you." Hah, before I wouldn't have cared, preferred to stay away from my parents. But there was the feeling deep within me that yearned to be their daughter again. To not be a fuck up, or not to have messed up my life so badly. To not take drugs, or alcohol to escape all my pain and hurt. But that wasn't my life, it wasn't me. No matter how much I wished for that to be true, it never was. So avoiding her gaze, staring at the dark ground, I shrugged my shoulders before turning my body around, allowing myself to pretend she wasn't there. It didn't work, but at least I was given a breather. "I know I'm not the best. That I'm a screw up. I wish I wasn't, I wish I was the daughter you and dad want me to be. But I can't, I don't know how." At least her meeting with Gwen had cracked part of her emotional armor.

"You shouldn't have to worry about me. It's my fault that you are. I'm lost, I'm fucking addicted to all this shit." Pointing to the vial mostly since that was the only thing on her that alluded to such things. "I started when I was teased and bullied, then when the deaths happened, it got worse." And this my friends, was the most I'd admitted to my mother. But I wanted help, I wanted to be free. And I had my sister to thank. Without her words back at the apartment after being attacked by a group of lycans, I would have snapped at my mother and told her to get out. "Were you really worried or are you just toying with my mind?" Nope, there was that personality people knew me for! Had to ruin such a good thing when it was on a roll. "Sorry, drug talking. I think. I don't actually know." Lost in a sea, such a strange world we lived in, for once I was glad that my mother was around.

[Selene]

Selene

I stood in the doorway and waited for Sierra to acknowledge my presence. I could see the look of surprise on her face as the realization dawned on her that it was me standing there. It was me that had tracked her down and found her. Though I'm not sure why she would be so surprised. My heart hurt for her. She had it in her head that no one cared about her it seemed. How so much humanity had filter down to her I didn't know. It was so very much like Michael though. Just the fact that she called me mom, bringing a rare smile to my face. Gwen rarely if ever called me mom.

I stood quietly and let her say what was on her mind. Watching as she crushed the now empty vial in her hand. She was lashing out, confusion and frustration oozing from her being. I nodded as she gave me a bit of a consolation by saying that I was the one that she would choose to disturb her solitude. She must have had a chat with Gwen fairly recently I thought. A bit of progress it seemed. When it seemed that she had finished I moved toward her. Slowly I approached her. I reached out for her hand and gently brushed the broken glass from it. She would heal quickly, the wounds were not severe. Her rapid healing already stopping the blood from flowing.

"I am your mother Sierra. I love you, I worry."

I let go of her hand and raised my hand to touch her face. Lifting her chin so she had to look at me. I looked into her eyes, willing her to see that mine was not a look of pity but that of a mother concerned for her troubled daughter. I couldn't help but see Michael in her face. So emotional, a tortured soul.

"Sierra, you are so much like your father. And while that may be difficult for you, because you feel so much, it is also what makes you special. Do I wish that you would stop this self destructive behavior? Of course I do. But, you are precious to me no matter what you do. I only wish I could help you, reach you. How can you not see how much we all want you back. We are your family. We don't judge you."

I continued to look at her. Hoping that I was getting through to her. I am over 600 years old, all the wisdom I had gained in that time and here I struggled to be a good mother. How could it not be my own failure that my daughter suffered so much. I wished for Michael to be here with us. He would know what to say. To comfort her more than I. I could maybe say the words but there was a warmth to Michael that I didn't have, no matter how hard I tried. And I did try. Sierra brought out the emotions in me, the only other one that really did that was Michael. Gwen and I bonded in a different way. It was all so complicated. I knew that Sierra thought because of that I must have loved Gwen more. I didn't know how to express to her that it was not the case. I loved my daughters both equally. With every fiber of my being. I hoped that Sierra would come to see that. That is why I came for her. She needed me.